Dad’s Birthday Idea

Had an idea today (I’m sure it’s not an original one) to put together a SnapFish book, for dad’s birthday in October, full of scanned old pics from the early days of mom and dad’s marriage, bringing it to present day. Maybe it will help get him back in the present day timeframe when he’s lost in another decade. One day when he was insisting that mom was not his wife, she showed him some old pictures and don’t know if it convinced him, but at least it got him off the subject and interested in the pictures. A SnapFish book would be so convenient and easier than going through a bunch of pics. It will definitely take us til October 2 to go through them and publish it. Will let you know how it works out!

Birthdays and Anniversaries

Happy Birthday, August 1, to Mom…86 years. And now, August 2, Happy Anniversary to Mom and Dad…64 years! We all had a wonderful celebration lunch at Seasons 52 (my new fave) and dad was quite lucid throughout. I finally lost count, however, of how many times he asked me if we’d ever been there before. Dropped dad off at home and took mom shopping afterwards. It was a good day!

When dad realized it was her bday he said he was going to “walk across the street” to the WalMart to get a card. Walking across Hwy. 436 in Casselberry is a death-defying feat so she told him that his present to her would be NOT walking across the street to get a card. So, he didn’t.

Last week dad told mom there were 5 women living in the house and they were all too old to be his wife. Also, seems to think he was married 5 times…would love to be a fly on the wall of his brain to see what really is going on in there.

One problem seems to be solved with mom deciding to sleep in the guest bedroom. When he takes his shower at night, he gets very weird, closing doors so she won’t see him…apparently all the time thinking she is not his wife, and very paranoid about where she’s going to sleep. So, the first night she settles in the guest room, he pops in wondering where she is and why she’s not in bed! Ayayayay.

Getting back to reality and writing about it

My poor blog has been ignored too long! Something I learned at a recent columnists’ conference was not to waste the good stuff on FaceBook. How true…spending much too much time over there. To be honest, though, I’ve been putting some research on the back burner and just haven’t taken the time to get into it…like info my son sent me about the use of marijuana serum to treat dementia…sounds like something worth looking into. I also have a problem with “self-promotion”…feeling like anyone reading this doesn’t want to hear about how my grandsons are the most perfect little Einsteins in the world – not true but we all probably think that of our grandkids. And you don’t want to know what I had for breakfast while on the South Beach diet. TMI!

I do need to get back to the business at hand which is how to help my aging parents deal with dementia, depression, boredom and everything else that goes along with making them miserable. By the time you reach your mid-eighties, you deserve to be happy. Unfortunately, that is not the case in our situation. Dad is falling deeper into his alternate world and mom is not dealing with it well.

So this blog needs to address those matters more often, both reaching out for help and giving it when I can.

On a positive note, my sister, mom and I are signed up for a caregivers’ seminar at a local library in August – tried for July but was already booked – a reaffirmation that we are not the only ones out there dealing with the downside of aging.

Looking at the upside of getting older, especially in retirement, we’ve done some traveling over this past year to include a cruise to the Western Caribbean and a cool (in more ways than one) trip to Michigan, taking in Detroit and the upstate regions of Lake Michigan. The weather was wonderfully chilly and the wine was tasty. I’d definitely recommend a visit to this friendly and creative state. Ready for another northern adventure to get out of this damned heat. Sounds like Alaska is the only place to escape – even Montreal is in the 90’s today! Aargh

So, if anybody out there is interested, I will be committing to at least 3 times a week of updates, links, etc. Please feel free to send along any helpful info regarding aging parents, dementia, etc…as we need all the help we can get!